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Bookmark Memories BookmarkIf you'd like an actual bookmark, with these memories printed on them, so that they're easy to refer to, physically:
https://www.zazzle.com/inspirational_bookmarks_the_remmert_method-256523541579652377
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The purpose of these Bookmark Memories is to give some guidance and reference for what you’re aiming for.
When you feel overwhelmed, or don’t know where to start or what to do next, keep coming back to these six Bookmark Memories. Each of these Bookmarks is designed to develop, not only the feelings of safety and connection, but “evidence” that “proves” you’re safe, loved, and connected. See if you can imagine each of the following memories as you read them. It may be difficult to do at first but if you find you aren’t able to imagine them, notice what happens when you try. If any memories pop up that contradict these Bookmark Memories, change them, and practice the new ones.
When you feel overwhelmed, or don’t know where to start or what to do next, keep coming back to these six Bookmark Memories. Each of these Bookmarks is designed to develop, not only the feelings of safety and connection, but “evidence” that “proves” you’re safe, loved, and connected. See if you can imagine each of the following memories as you read them. It may be difficult to do at first but if you find you aren’t able to imagine them, notice what happens when you try. If any memories pop up that contradict these Bookmark Memories, change them, and practice the new ones.
1. Bedtime stories - both parents sitting either side of you, reading a bedtime story, with the feeling of love, safety, connection, etc.
Feelings: Safe, loved, connection.
2. Walking into a room, and your parents' faces light up, they immediately stop what they're doing, and fully focus on you.
Feelings: I'm important, valued, loved, worthy. I light up a room.
3. You're talking, and both parents are listening, allowing you to speak, nodding, and understanding, and agreeing.
Feelings: I have the power to speak, it's safe to speak, I'm heard, I'm important, I'm valuable, I'm safe.
4. You're saying "No" to your parents (no details needed, you're just saying no to something you don't want), and your parents say, kindly, compassionately, supportively and lovingly "Okay, of course, no problem, what would you like instead?"
Feelings: I have the power to say "no" and that is respected. I am empowered to choose what I want to experience. It's safe to say "no".
5. Playing a game or doing a fun activity with both parents.
Feelings: I'm safe, it's safe to have fun, it's normal for life to feel good. Connection.
6. Sitting on the sofa with both parents, cuddling.
Feelings: Physical affection. I'm safe, loved, valuable.
Feelings: Safe, loved, connection.
2. Walking into a room, and your parents' faces light up, they immediately stop what they're doing, and fully focus on you.
Feelings: I'm important, valued, loved, worthy. I light up a room.
3. You're talking, and both parents are listening, allowing you to speak, nodding, and understanding, and agreeing.
Feelings: I have the power to speak, it's safe to speak, I'm heard, I'm important, I'm valuable, I'm safe.
4. You're saying "No" to your parents (no details needed, you're just saying no to something you don't want), and your parents say, kindly, compassionately, supportively and lovingly "Okay, of course, no problem, what would you like instead?"
Feelings: I have the power to say "no" and that is respected. I am empowered to choose what I want to experience. It's safe to say "no".
5. Playing a game or doing a fun activity with both parents.
Feelings: I'm safe, it's safe to have fun, it's normal for life to feel good. Connection.
6. Sitting on the sofa with both parents, cuddling.
Feelings: Physical affection. I'm safe, loved, valuable.
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